GET OFF MY STAGE!

I'll admit I love the Jeremy Kyle show.

It's not even a guilty pleasure any more, I just genuinely LOVE it.

The US has its fair share of outrageous daytime talk shows but JK has proved there's a niche market in the UK for white trash scum to have free DNA tests and lie detector results paraded for all to see. And it wouldn't be nothing without Kyle himself: the shouting, the sitting-on-stage, the goading, the catchphrases ("get off your backside and get a job", "it says Jeremy Kyle up there and it's my stage" etc.) and the ego-mania.

But the one thing that cracks me up are the opening credits.
There he is walking through crowded streets, contemplating the world around him and looking not unlike Paul Morley when he turned up in the middle of an episode of 'Hitman & Her' (couldn't find a Youtube clip but if you saw the show, you'll know what I mean).

The only thing letting it all down is the shitty theme tune: Farty pre-set brass stabs over a below-par Propellerheads B-side... Urrrghhh!

So when GYBO began it's 'TV Theme Challenge' last month, it inspired me to come up with THIS

The Jeremy Kyle Theme mashed with MSTRKRFT's Remix of 'D.A.N.C.E.' by Justice.

Oh yes.

KT TUNSTALL-TON... KT CAPLETON-STALL... ?

Don't they look happy together?

So I hold my hands up and admit I hadn't even heard KT Tunstall's 'Hold On' until I saw the vid on TV a few weeks ago and the first thing that struck me was "that could be a ragga track!".

Quick scan thru my ragga pellas... Capleton, that'll do. Et voila!

"Caple-Tunstall" (although I could have just called it "Everybody Hold On" I suppose?)

Download here

HAPPY NEW YEAR??!!??

I can't BELIEVE it's been nearly four months since I posted anything on here. That is DISGUSTING behaviour!! Well, I'm sorry but I HAVE been busy and I now have around a dozen half-finished mash-ups and ideas for things (honest!) that will be posted here very soon.
In the mean time, a very clever guy calling himself VJ Brewski has made a video for my Paul Young / Nelly Furtado thing!
The two visuals do work well together in a strange sort-of way, although you can't ignore the fact that the Furtado vid must have cost a thousand times the budget of the Paul Young promo. But at least Paul's tells a little story and he gets to do some acting, not just fanny about in front of a helicopter...

COME BACK AND SAY IT RIGHT

I'd been looking for a 12" version of Paul Young's "Come Back And Stay" since I first heard "Say It Right" and eventually found a copy in one of Notting Hill's second-hand establishments, for the gargantuan sum of 10p!

That's right, TEN WHOLE PENCE!!


I can't think of a single thing that costs 10p, not even nasty little cheapo sweets! There's not a scratch on it either!
The downside, however, is it's awful.

I was hoping there would be some nice instrumental sections or maybe a few Pino Palladino licks but this is one of those 1983 extended-remix-for-the-sake-of-it type things: horrible out-of-time delay on the snares, some nasty farty bass sound and any empty parts are filled with s-s-s-sampled vocal snippets by the backing singers (who were called 'The Fabulous Wealthy Tarts' - what's THAT all about?).

Now, I could probably use some of these sections but they're technically so badly done, you might think it was ME and I can't have that! The addition of a little breakbeat helps move things along a little and here's the finished result:
Download here

SUPER-SOULJA

The pic says it all...
Download here: